Last weekend, the Labor Day Long Weekend, we headed out for a camping trip. This one was a little different as my Mom was coming along. We had no set agenda, just that we were heading southeast and would spend our first night at the Mud Buttes, near Monitor. I booked an extra day off work and we set out on Friday morning. It was with some trepidation that I drove past Coronation, on Highway 12 as this was the very spot where the wheels of our trailer were knocked out on the Canada Day long weekend two months prior. This time we rolled along without incident.
By late afternoon we found ourselves up at the Mud Buttes. We set up the trailer and settled down for a nice evening. The mosquitos were in out in full force and as soon as one got into a sheltered spot, away from the breeze, they quickly swarmed. We wandered around a bit before settling down in the trailer for a nice evening meal. Later that evening a storm rolled in and it was a typical prairie thunderstorm. We were completely out in the open, on top of a high hill, out in the middle of the prairie. The winds were strong and rocked the trailer all night, and lightning crashed all around us. The rain seemed to be mostly wind driven and did not seem to be all that great in quantity. I was a little concerned about being able to negotiate the truck and trailer out on the narrow gravel road in the morning.
The next morning dawned overcast, cool and wet. But it was breezy, and later the sun came out and it seemed to dry off relatively quickly. We all hiked down into the badlands below our camping spot and had a great day exploring and collecting rocks. By the time we packed up and hit the road in the middle of the afternoon it had dried off nicely and there were no issues getting back onto the pavement.
We travelled east into Saskatchewan and then turned south. By late afternoon we found ourselves down in Loverna. This town, once home to several hundred people, now had seven permanent residents. Most of the town is now gone but a handful of houses, community hall, legion hall, three churches, a couple of stores and post office still remain. We spent the afternoon wandering around and a couple of locals let us into the community hall to view the collection of old photographs and newspaper clippings that were on display. We had a BBQ at the trailer that evening, where we had set up on the side of one of the town streets. We were looking forward to more exploring the next morning.
On Sunday morning we received a number of messages and phone calls from my brothers. It seems my Dad had taken a sudden turn for the worse and had been rushed into hospital that morning. The medical staff were not sure whether it was a stroke, or some sort of infection. Fortunately my brother Greg was home and was able to head over to the hospital right away. We stayed in touch with him and he kept us posted as to what was going on. A CT-scan confirmed that he had not suffered a stoke so he was put on an IV and antibiotics were administered to combat the infection. Initially he seemed to pick up a little and Greg said that his vital signs improved and he started to show some color. Initially he had been in shock when first admitted to hospital. We decided to wait for about half an hour for the next update from the doctors, before hitting the road for home. But when that update came it was too late... Dad had passed away...
Age and deterioration had robbed his body of strength and he was not able to fight off the infection and blood poisoning that had set in. I am grateful that my brother Greg was able to be with him when he passed away. But I feel guilty for taking my Mom away and not allowing her the opportunity to be with him in his final hours. I also feel guilty that I did not spend as much time as I could have with him, over the past few months. I am grateful that I did go see him and spend an afternoon with him a couple of weeks prior. I took him outside for a walk and spent a couple of hours visiting with him. Sadly that was the last time that I saw him.
I feel like I lost Dad three times... the first was back in the mid 1990's... He took a fall off of a ladder in his workshop and fractured his skull. He suffered a significant brain injury and for a while there it looked as though he wouldn't make it. He eventually recovered, to about 85%, but since that time his memory and his balance suffered, and he really aged. In recent years his mental condition signficantly deteriorated. The diagnosis was that it was likely Alzheimers disease, though this can only be 100% confirmed pathologically. Maybe it was just the eventual deterioration and worsening of his prior brain injury. Eventually his memory got so bad that I felt as though we had lost him again. He became very confused and it was difficult to even carry on a conversation with him. I'm grateful to my Mom for keeping him at home as long as she did and giving him the best possible care that she could. She just about killed herself in the process, but it did give Dad a little better quality of life at the end.
I believe that eventually his body just gave up. We were forced to put him into long term care at the end of 2012 and once he got there is condition steadily deteriorated. He soon lost the ability to walk and move around and then his mental state deteriorated even further. We lost him for the third and final time last week.
My brothers and I really bonded with each other and with our mother these last few days. We dealt with the difficult task of planning Dad's memorial service and making all the related arrangements. It was a difficult few days and we really relied on each other to get through it. I really enjoyed the time spent with my brothers as we went through the archive of old photographs and video clips and put together a video and some photographs for his memorial. The service was attended just by the immediate family and my dad's surviving brothers and sisters. Once we were finally able to do that for him I felt as though I finally had the opportunity to say goodbye and now feel a sense of closure. Hopefully he is in a better place...
